Bittersweet

I was getting breakfast on the table this morning and noticed both Lovebug and Princess checking their blood sugar.  When did this happen?  Why are they growing up so fast??

I think I have said this before, I love watching my oldest (and non d-kid) grow up. I love watching her learn new things and watch her personality come out.  It has been a little different with Lovebug and Princess.  I love watching them grow up too, but it is a little more bittersweet with them.

As they grow up, they become more aware of their diabetes and that they are "different".  Lovebug is just starting to notice this. (or at least express to me that she notices) They also become more independent with their diabetes and take on a little more of the responsibility so they can be "free".  Lovebug started wanting to check her own blood sugar about 6 months ago and does it on and off all the time.  I still ask her if she wants me to do it, but she usually tells me she wants to.  Then there is Princess. My little miss independent.  She sees Lovebug checking her blood sugar and wants to check herself also.  I know it's because big sis is doing it and she wants to be like her big sister.

It's hard to watch though.  I don't like that Princess wants to take on this responsibility at such a young age.  I want her to want me to do it.  Neither of them really understand this is going to be with them the rest of their lives.  (unless of course we get a CURE which would be more then WONDERFUL!!) Despite it all, when they get tired of checking their blood sugar I will be there to take over it again.

Someday it will be their responsibility and I won't be able to take it from them.  Until then I will do everything I can for them.

Time for a change

More change isn't something I was really looking for right now. Seriously, we have had enough this past 10 months.  But Lovebug has (in her own special way) convinced me that change is what she wants and so change is what she is going to get. 

It all started back in October.  We had been toying around with the idea and when Lovebug's Celiac panel came back positive we decided to put it on hold until we knew rather or not we were looking at a diagnosis.

At Christmas, things changed.  

Her pump broke Christmas night.  So, because of the Holiday we had to wait 3 days for a new pump.  It was back to MDI it for a few days.  I was a little terrified because I wasn't sure how she would react to having to have shots again, but like usual, she was a trooper about it.  My biggest surprise was that night when she realized that she didn't have to wear a pump shirt or a pump pouch to bed.  She was ECSTATIC that she didn't have to wear either to bed.  I just can not explain in words how happy she was.  I could see it in her eyes.  So much so that it made me tear up.  I never knew that she was concerned about her pump pouches. I asked her why she didn't like them and she said, " I like them Mom, I just don't like having to wear them all the time."  Wow, what a way to break a mothers heart.  She has always been such a trooper about everything when it came to her diabetes.  I never knew she felt that way.  Powerful words coming from a (almost) 6 year old.  

All three days she was without her pump, she woke up to realize that she didn't have to put a pump pouch on that morning.  She was so happy that I thought about keeping her on shots and not going back to the pump for a while.  She was THAT happy.  Realistically, I knew that wouldn't really be the best move, especially considering school!.  

When her new pump came a few days later, she wasn't even excited about it.  It made me very sad.  I want her to be happy on the pump, not sad and wishing that she didn't have to have something attached to her waist 24/7.  

It made my hubby and I think a bit, although we didn't have to think about it too long.  You see, Lovebug found something in our diabetes supply cabinet that I had actually forgotten were there.  Demo Omni Pods.  

When she found them, she insisted on wearing one.  Seriously, insisted.  I asked her if she knew what it was, and her reply was, "Yes, mom.  It's a pump!"  So I explained to her how the pod works and she told me she would like to have one.  A real one.  

I was a little shocked.  I thought that the "fun" of it would go away after a couple weeks, and it didn't.  She kept asking me when she was going to get her real pod.  Um, I don't know....soon?  (in the meantime she was still wearing the demo pods, she didn't want to take them off!!) So my hubby and I had  a serious talk at this point.  We also talked with other friends whose kids use the pod and even had Lovebug watch some videos on YouTube of other kids with their pods.  The video's made her even more excited. She is sold, so we are sold.  We called the endo's office and started the process of switching.  

Now, I have add that I personally LOVE the Ping that Lovebug uses now  If it weren't for her prodding us along there would have been no switch.  Why change a good thing, right? But this is what she wants and what will make her happy. If it makes diabetes just little easier or her, then I am for it!! 

Her first shipment of pods came today and she was jumping up and down hugging me when she got home from school. We are just waiting on the PDM to get her, which should be here in a few days and a little training from our CDE and we will be good to go!

Lovebug is so excited and I have to admit that I am excited for her!!