Showing posts with label Envy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Envy. Show all posts

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Envy

We are off to the in-laws today and every time we go I still feel like I have to pack everything but the kitchen sink, especially since diabetes started coming along.  As I was packing all of our extra "stuff" (and in stuff I mean diabetes supplies) I started thinking about "normal" families, those without diabetes in their lives.

Honestly, I envy them!  What I wouldn't give to not have to take all those extra insulin supplies along with us everywhere we go.  Or check Lovebug's blood sugar or look at Dexie each and every time we walk out the door.  It would be so nice to to be able to walk out the door and not worry about those things.

I would love to be able to actually drop Lovebug off for a play date rather then having to stay with her,  because not everyone is comfortable with diabetes.  Even when I can drop her off  I  rarely get away without getting a phone call or text about a high or low blood sugar and what to do about it.

I really envy friends who can just plan a get-a-way with their spouse,  without the kids.  I barely remember what that is like, and I'm sure it will be a few more years until my hubby and I can get away again. It probably  won't be until  Lovebug is a little more able to take care of some of her diabetes care herself.

Even if I could get away, I wouldn't really get a break from diabetes.  I may be physically away but I'm never emotionally away from diabetes.  That is one of the hardest things about this disease is that it never takes a break, no matter where you are.

Yeah, I have my days, don't we all, when we envy what someone else has. While I know that envy isn't a good thing to have, It's hard not to have it when I look at "normal" families and wish that I had had that again.   Those carefree days are gone.  I do try to make life as normal as possible for Lovebug and the rest of us but it's hard.  It is very draining both physically and emotionally.  But, we do the best with we can with the circumstances that God has given us and that's all we can do.

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